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Réponse de Melinda
07 mai 2014, 23 h 50

Hello..things have been quiet lately. Stan finished 10 radiation treatments and is doing okay.
Still lots of swelling and radiation burn. Have special cream that we put on the burn...he is experiencing a bit of pain...sharp jabbing pains in his face...that only last a second or two. Hopefully they won't get any worse. He is now having radiation for three lumps that are appearing on his chest. His brother took him today for his treatment; for which I was extremely grateful. This brother is the only one in his family that tries to help..bless his heart.
Next week I will take him for more radiation on his chest...and we don't know how many more he will be given. He is bugging the chemo Doctor to give him more chemo...and he told Stan that he would see...but of course cannot give it to him now because of the radiation. This cancer is so aggressive! It amazes me. As soon as Stan does not receive any sort of treatment, the cancer just grows like crazy..very scary! I agree with you...the Doctors are obviously doing everything they can to keep him alive and with a decent quality of life. And like Len, Stan is having alot of infections. He is on another type now...they constantly switch so he won't become immune. Stan is certainly one tough cookie! I am still feeling exhausted. Went to see the Doctor about my bad heartburn. I will be getting a scope at some point to check things out. I am on medication that is helping alot...anyway the Doctor asked if I smoked or drank or had stress!!! Laughing out loud!!
He figures alot of it is just stress..ya think!! Well at least the weather is starting to warm up a bit and the sun is out alot...actually relaxed on the deck without freezing this afternoon. Though we still have some iceburgs floating down the river!! Thanks for "listening" once again Tracie..I hope things are okay in your world.   Melinda
 
Réponse de marstin
08 mai 2014, 1 h 02

Hi Melinda,

Isn't it incredible how much a person can go through and still come out fighting? The strength that Stan shows is amazing. Of course I also look at you and see how incredibly supportive you are and I know how difficult this has been for you to deal with every twist and turn that has come your way. HaHa! The doctor actually asked you if you had stress? Oh, only every minute of every day.

Those darn infections are horrible. I think Len still had one when he came home and it was never taken care of. I know he had a problem with loose bowels when the medication he was on was supposed to have the opposite affect. So often I brought the subject up but it wasn't until he became extremely thin and weak and couldn't keep anything in his system that they heard me at all. Even then they didn't seem too concerned. I often think that if things had been handled properly right from the beginning, he would still be here. Too many mistakes made. It sounds like Stan's health care team is working hard to keep him going.

Thank goodness at least one person in Stan's family is stepping up and bringing you some support. I don't think Len's closest brother even came to see him until the day before he passed away and then he came with another brother from the Island who had come over for the wedding. Len freaked out when he saw both of them. When their mom was sick, Len and his closest brother went to the Island to see her and after spending the day together she suddenly passed away. Within a few months the oldest brother was dying of cancer and when Len and the closest brother went to see him, he too passed away. Everyone used to laugh and say they didn't want to have the two of them come to visit because it didn't end well. I'm sure that Len felt that it was his time when he saw his brothers together. He was gone the next day.

If you were watching a documetary on how quickly cancer can spread you would probably be fascinated. Having to live this nightmare has to be so difficult for you. No wonder you are exhausted. You are doing a great job Melinda.

How nice that you were able to take some time out to sit out on your deck and soak in some of that sunshine. I find that it helps to recharge your batteries a bit and bring some calmness. Iceburgs eh? That makes me shiver.

Hugs,
Tracie

 
Réponse de KathCull_admin
08 mai 2014, 2 h 00

Hi Melinda and Tracie
Melinda, I am glad you were able to get your health concerns checked out - it can be hard to find the time/energy for yourself when your days and mind are full to overflowing.

Sometimes what helps the most is just so simple isn't it - going outside, taking a few minutes to just be.

Take care both of you.
Katherine 
 
Réponse de marstin
14 mai 2014, 0 h 10

Hi Melinda,

I keep thinking about you and thought I would check in and see how you are doing. Is Stan still getting radiation for the new areas of cancer or have they stopped the treatment? I hope that you are taking care of yourself and that the sun is shining where you are.

Hugs,
Tracie
 
Réponse de Melinda
18 mai 2014, 14 h 30

Hello...just wanted to check in. Stan has gone fishing with the neighbour. Was talking to his wife and apparently the fishing trip is "all about Stan!" They can see how weak he is getting and decided to try and get him fishing (one of the things he loves!!). What wonderful kind neighbours...I could cry.  Stan was not going to go..I said to him "It's so sad that the cancer is robbing you of the things you love to do." Thats all I said...and first thing you know, he decides to go!! He is all finished the 10 radiation treatments on his neck. It has been a good thing. The area has shrunk and the bleeding is almost all gone. So we will enjoy it while it lasts...which apparently can be up to two months...that is scary!  Now he is getting radiation on his chest for three lumps that have appeared. He has had two treatments and we don't go back to see the Doctor until the middle of June...so a nice break. I dread the day treatment no longer works..but will cross that bridge when it comes. The Doctors have done a wonderful job on keeping him alive as long as it has been.
Buddy is back splitting our winter wood...and now I am off to the Doctor because I am having alot of trouble breathing. (I swear alot of my health troubles are because of him) Anyway, I made Stan promise we would have a good summer....and that meant not having Buddy hanging around.  So we will see!! My son occasionlly hires Buddy to help him with stuff around his house...and he apparently had a good chat with Buddy last week and told him that he has to "finish" the job at our place and then move on. I don't like bothering my son with alot of my problems...but I quess this one problem is very obvious..lol!
Anyway hope you are having a wonderful weekend! I am enjoying being at home..though it is still bloody cold here in northen Ontario (still making a fire in the evenings!). Well at least it is keeping the black flies and mosquitos away!!  Take care    Melinda
 
Réponse de marstin
18 mai 2014, 16 h 47

Hi Melinda,

How incredibly kind of your neighbors to whisk Stan away for the day. I love how you just made that comment then left it alone. Sometime's that's all it takes. On this journey I found that there were many surprises by people you least expected to step up and help. A friend of Len's knew how badly he wanted to make a trip to Vancouver Island to the family cabin when he was becoming very weak and made it happen. Off they went for the weekend and when they returned I could see the peace in Len's eyes.

What a relief it must be to see that the bleeding is almost gone and that you have a bit of a reprieve from running to treatments for a little while. I don't think we realize how incredibly busy our lives are with running back and forth to appointments until we have a bit of a break from it. As tough as it is, if you can avoid looking too far into the future, it is easier on your mind.

Maybe you are right about your health issues coming from having the buddy around. Since he stresses you out so much it can trigger anxiety which of course can cause breathing issues among many other things. I guess Stan finds some comfort in having the guy around but it only stresses you out. I'm glad that you did mention this guy to your son and that he had a chat with him. Yay for your son. It's good to have someone around that has your back.

Is it ever going to warm up out there? Here on the coast we're enjoying warm, sunny weather with a chance of rain. I've been out in my garden a bit clearing out the flower beds to pretty it up for the sale of our home. I've also been feverishly cleaning and clearing the inside of the house as the realtor is coming by tomorrow to talk about getting the house on the market. It's a huge step forward and a frightening one but it's necessary to be able to start our new lives. Part of me is ready to face the future but the other part of me just wants to run away and hide.

I hope you are kicking back relaxing a bit today and that somehow the sunshine finds it's way to you.

Hugs,
Tracie
 
Réponse de Xenia
18 mai 2014, 19 h 36

Hello Melinda and Tracie:

How wonderful that your neighbours took Stan fishing.  Tracie you have such good insight into a lot of the problems we are having.  Keeps me on top of my troubles.

John has been having a few very bad days.  Called the doctor's office as arranged and doctor called back to increase his morphine.  Asked if I had to change his diet and dr replied no it is his cancer causing the problems in his chest, throat and stomach area.  He always closes his calls with "Questions?" letting me know I can ask him anything I need to know about John's needs etc.  He told me to call him Wednesday and he would come over and check John out either Wednesday or Thursday.  We are so fortunate to have him as our doctor.

We have been having good weather and John is looking forward to getting out in his wheelchair one of these days.  Daughter told him she would take him for a trip around the block and to the small park we have on our street.  John never complains and when he asks for extra meds he is in real pain, something he says, so it is easy to please him.  Such as last night for dinner, daughter made some oven baked vegetables, carrots, squash, mushrooms, onions and parsnip, with garlic and olive oil.  He enjoyed his meal so much and asked for a bit more, also she brought some chicken that had been marinated in some great marinade and he could eat it as well, small amount but it was moist.  Our son found this great butcher on one of the streets in Vancouver and she has been bbqing it and felt her dad could eat it too.  It was so good to see him really enjoying the meal and sitting at the table with the 5 of us.

Daughter and son will visit on Tuesday, were going to come Monday but there is a rodeo in the town close to us so the Hiways will be clogged.  Seems that the summer activities have really reved up once May came.

Melinda, re your health.  Do get your check up and look after yourself.  I am going through something similiar.  When my doctor, who had the stroke and is no longer my doctor, took it serious when I told him I was waking up in a panic and heart pounding he sent me for a Holter test and then found that my heart beat was too rapid, then made an appointment with the cardiologist.  That appointment is the 27th and I have been to the walk in clinic to find a doctor who would receive the results from the cardiologist about what is going on.   I would go to my husband's doctor but feel that he would be taking me on because of John as his practice along with the other 2 doctors is overwhelmed now.  So, I pray that August comes quickly as I have an appointment interview with a doctor to see if she will take me on. 

Getting on and I have to get John his lunch so will sign off.

Take care all.

Xenia
 
Réponse de Melinda
24 mai 2014, 0 h 23

God,he is so crabby! I am sure it will come out sooner or later what the matter is, but right now I am on eggshells! He went to a funeral today for a former co-workers Mom, who died suddenly. So I know that was upsetting for him. Plus he did not sleep with the worry of the funeral. Then this evening he had stabbing pains in his eye...scary...but they went away quickly. At least the bleeding has stopped....But the stress for me is awful (whine, whine!).
The Doctor put me on puffers the other day. Damage from second hand smoke..imagine that.
Stan is really upset with me and denies second hand smoke is bad....he says I don't need to blame my lung issues on him and Buddy smoking up a storm in the basement all winter.  And this is from a man whose Mother died of lung cancer and never smoked a day in her life...but her family all smoked in the house around her. Boy, I am on a rant! lol! Anyway I feel like screaming and running away. Do you ever feel you cannot take one more day?
 
Réponse de marstin
24 mai 2014, 3 h 52

Hi Melinda,

It sounds like Stan wants to make you feel as miserable as he is. Rant on you poor girl. You know the saying 'you always hurt the ones closest to you'. I guess that Stan feels secure in taking his pain and anger out on you. I don't think he takes into account just how fortunate he is to have you standing by his side. He needs you which probably makes him even angrier. It makes me think of how my dad was with my mom. Always lashing out to make her feel bad but knowing he would be lost without her. Stan is probably feeling guilty about you having you use puffers so he turns it on you. Hang in there.

Lol! Nearly every day I want to run away at some point. Between my kids, the dog and the stress of preparing this house to sell it, I'm ready to scream. I actually tell Len off quite often for being such a pack rat and leaving me with the mess. I can almost hear him chuckling but in an apologetic way. I get on his younger brothers case all of the time and tell him that he better make sure he has everything in order so that his wife never has to fear going through what I have. I think watching what I have gone through has smartened him up a lot.

You carry on ranting here, you're among friends. Is the buddy still hanging around? I hope he finds something else to do far, far away from you. He only seems to add fuel to the fire. Deep breaths Melinda. You can do this!

Hugs,
Tracie
 
Réponse de marstin
24 mai 2014, 4 h 11

Hi Zenia,

Thanks for the compliment. I can only speak from the heart and sometimes feel like I say too much. I sure wish I had a doctor like John does. He sounds amazing. Have you asked him if he would take you on as a patient? It's so hard to find a doctor that's capable of listening at all and this one sounds like a real gem. I'm sure that he would graciously accept you.

Have you managed to get John out in his wheelchair? We've had some pretty warm days lately. That fresh air does wonders for a person's spirits. It sounds like your daughter has a knack for making tasty food and your son has found a great butcher shop. Do you know what the name of the place is?

How is John's pain level? It's hard to watch someone struggle with that. I hope that you are doing your best to take some time to look after yourself. It's such a tough thing to do but with you having some health issues, it's pretty important. You are important.

Hugs,
Tracie


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