Hugs to all struggling through this holiday season. I lost my Mom at the end of June and I would say I have not really took the time to grieve...I find I run through that last week or so in my dreams with the same ending everytime...she was alone. I struggle with that and guilt. We got through Thanksgiving by inviting some wonderful friends that changed things up some. For Christmas I have purchased both of my daughters and I a special ornament for our trees, which we have done for all that have gone on before us. We will have a candle burning all day for those we have lost as well. Last year was very stressful because my mom was not well enough to join us and would not have us come to her.We all offered to pick her up etc. This year I will not have that stress and she is front and centre on the fireplace as I have decided to scatter her ashes on Mother's Day.This year she can watch over all the the kids while they skate on the creek, rip open presents and we will toast her each in our own unique way.We will continue with old traditions and possibly start new ones. My mom stopped loving Christmas after her parents died..I will not do that to my girls and grandsons....It is a wonderful joyful season and we can share stories of past holidays shared..There will be pain & sorrow but we must try and allow some joy to slip in..We need to not only embrace those we have lost ,but those we still have. From my little family to yours we wish you strenght,joy,love, laughter and healing tears. Hugs to all Luv Tracy