Hi All - my husband passed Feb 26. We were together 38 years. I'm no stranger to grief but this is so different. I've buried my parents, a brother, a niece and my son. I thought I knew loss. This has sent me reeling. I struggle to get through each hour. Every morning I have to literally force myself to get out of bed. When my son died it was my husband that got me through. Now without him it's so darn hard. I have to get up, have to go to work. Every task takes so much focus that I am getting migraines, I run my own business so my employees count on me. I am trying so hard but I feel like everything is falling apart. I was having a particularly difficult moment and asked one of my guys to just give me a second to let me think through a scheduling problem and he snapped at me that everyone has problems. It took everything I had in that moment not to walk out and never return. I missed two days when my husband died. I was only asking for 5 minutes. The lack of compassion was stunning. I know after the funeral everyone goes back to their lives and you are left to pick up the pieces quietly and so often alone but I expected better. The callousness of the world has got me down. I have been doing my best and keeping myself together but Friday nights are hard. We would sit after dinner and just talk. Now it's just quiet. All the time. I just miss the rhythm of our lives together. It was comfortable and predictable. Now everything is feels wrong.