Hi everyone
I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. We are having a HECK of a year. Shortly afer I posted this, on Mar. 1st, we had a house fire. We are all ok, and didn't lose the house completey, but have been living elsewhere for a month and probably out for at least another month. I guess the decision has been made for me about where my father should be.
He is still at home and will stay there. He has a nurse coming every two days to check on him and give my mom (and us) support. Knowing she is coming is a comfort since we can't be there all the time with the distance between us. Dad is very frail and weak now and only drinking maybe a bottle of water a day, maybe a 1/4 cup of cereal or an egg in the morning and that is about all. He is proabably about 115, maybe less....for a man who is normally 180-190lbs.
He is starting to have strange dreams, almost hallucinating, and the other day, when getting out of bed, his knees buckled and we had to catch him. Luckily my brother and I were there to help, but it really worried us to know this might happen with just my mom around....her hip is bad...what if they both fall?!!
The nurse told us that hallucinating and strange dreams are all part of the process, but I asked if maybe the Hydromorph that he is taking (every 12 hours) is too strong now that he has lost so much weight. She said she could talk to the doctor, but my mom is worried that if we decrease his dose, he might be in pain. Luckily though, he has not had pain so far, so why not try the lower dose and cut the risk of a fall, and maybe he would be more alert. I notice he's getting confused lately in his thoughts, and I know this can easily be blamed on the Ca, but what if it's just a matter of the pain meds being to strong. Anyone have any experience with this? Some people I know that have had a dying relative, had the same thing happen...some lowered the dose of pain meds and the patient was better....at least for a while.
Anyway, we are trying to deal with a lot right now, I'm tired, but I need to try to see my dad as much as I can. He is a wonderful man, a very loving father, and treated my mom like a princess. They love each other so much. They have dated since my mom was about 15 and it breaks my heart to know they won't be able to be together anymore. I will miss his advice, and the time and patience he devoted to my kids.
Thank you all for your advice
Lisa