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Forever Changed - The Story of Mom's Final Journey

There are Moments that mark your life, moments when you realize nothing will ever be the same. And time is divided into two parts, before this and after this. – Author Unknown

Forever changed – The story of Mom’s final Journey

I sat quietly by her bedside watching her face intently, listening to her slow, quiet breathing. We were alone my Mother and I. The night before, just before heading to sleep in the cot next to her I told her I loved her dearly and announced that we were having our very first sleep over. I did not tell her it could very well be our last. Of course, she did not respond. She had been asleep this way since Saturday. It had been three days since I last heard her voice. She was unresponsive, in a sleep so deep, so quiet that you were almost fooled in to thinking that everything was fine. It was not.

Cancer has ravaged our family for as long as I can recall. It has taken the lives of countless family members. Eighteen months earlier, we found out it had taken up refuge in our Mother’s lungs. In part, it was not a huge shock. Mom had fought and won a battle with Thyroid Cancer years previously and we had been told then that the Cancer would manifest itself elsewhere within 5 to 6 years.

It was now just over six years later. I touched Mom’s brow gently and squeezed her soft, soft hand in mine. I told her it was morning and I told her again that I loved her. I let her know that I had sent Dad home to rest and he would be returning shortly before lunch. I recalled out loud the visit with her precious grand-babies the day earlier and told her she looked absolutely Angelic with the bright morning sun shining behind her. It looked as though the sun would finally win and perhaps provide relief from the cold winter we had endured up to then.
My telephone rang interrupting my thoughts. It was my daughter calling. She is my Mom’s eldest Grandchild and they have always had an incredible bond. The bond made stronger when she gave birth to my first grand-daughter, my Mom’s first great-granddaughter Lilly. She had been named for my Mother. I responded to my daughter’s frantic questions and then hung up. I looked at my Mom, and asked. “Is it true? Lilly said Baby Jesus is coming today. Is it true? My throat suddenly dry, a tightness forming in my chest.

I let myself cry then. I doubt I could have stopped it. I cried for her, for Dad and for our family. I cried for all the moments that wouldn’t be, all the hurt and pain Mom had surely endured over the last eighteen months of her life. I thought of how life would be forever changed. I wiped my tears and called Dad. I didn’t tell him what Lilly had said. I simply asked how his night had been and let him know that Mom was incredibly restful. He said he had slept soundly for the first time in months. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I realized that so had I. I knew then that Lilly was right. Today was the day, the day marked as after this. Our lives forever changed.
With all of us by her side, Mom passed peacefully that afternoon.

Written with love and from my heart, Chantal M. April 2017