I have always been a very independent creature. I think I come by it honestly – my parents, having immigrated from Russia, learned early on from their parents, how to work hard and not rely on others. However, sometimes this characteristic of mine stops me from asking for and receiving help.
After problems with vision, headache and left sided weakness, plus 3 visits to the emergency department, a CT scan showed that my husband had had a stroke. But I am strong. I could deal with this. A day or so later, I met one of our neighbours, and was curt almost to the point of rudeness. But I didn’t mention my husband’s ordeal, my tiredness, fear or sadness. That meant I could add guilt to all those other feelings. A few minutes later, I rang her doorbell to apologize. To my horror, tears came down my cheeks as she opened the door. I stumbled through my apology and the reason for my behaviour. She hugged me and asked if there was anything she could do. Through her touch and words, my heart felt lighter and I no longer felt as alone.
The ‘hard thing’ for me was to ‘let someone in’, but as T.A. Webb said, “A burden shared is a burden halved.”
Katherine